Dating and Relationships

Ask Bex- Gender Expression and Book Recommendations

Ask Bex

Hi Bex! I am in a poly relationship and I struggle with my bisexual role with my girlfriend. I want to explore being more “butch” as it feels right with her but that isn’t my day to day identity with my husband or my boyfriend/Dom. I can’t get my brain and social norms to stop influencing my behavior when I am with her. We have talked about this before and she is understanding and wants ... Read More »

Five First Date Conversation Starters For Nervous Nerds

First dates are weird, they’re awkward. You’re sitting alone with someone you barely know, drink in hand, trying to decide if you want to get all up close and naked with them. For me, this is honestly one of the most stressful environments around. Public speaking? Fine, I own the room, I control what happens. Huge parties? Whatever, if I run out of things to say or start feeling awkward I can just fade into ... Read More »

Seven SFW Saucy Snaps to Send Your Sweetie

Saucy Snaps

My Sir lives more than 12k miles away from me, so, as you might imagine, sexting is a pretty vital part of our relationship. That said, the cocktail of gender dysphoria and insecurities brewing in my brain mean I’m not always in the right headspace to send him nudes every time I want to get sexy. On top of that we’re not always in situations where it’s feasible to be looking at each other’s junk, as ... Read More »

Talk Flirty to Me

Cropped Flirt Fetish

I have jerked off to flirty banter alone. Not like, sexting with a cute human and getting myself off in the process. Not even just remembering that flirty moment where a cute human said something clever and I for once was sure that they were actually definitely into me. Well, I mean, I’ve done those things too. No, I mean I regularly lay in my bed imagining a conversation that never happened with a person who ... Read More »

No, My Last Relationship Wasn’t a Waste

Bex at Desk

Not long ago I was chatting with a co-worker when I casually mentioned my ex. I mentioned, in passing, that we had been together for more than six years and she said: “Wow, that’s terrible that over six years of your life was wasted with him.” She wasn’t trying to be awful, in fact, I think she was trying to be supportive. It’s a common sentiment after a breakup, but when you think about it ... Read More »