It’s been two months since writers block hit and in that time I’ve developed a rather impressive backlog of things I need to tell you about. There was #DildoHoliday, and Woodhull, and countless new toys. There have been new friends, and OKC misadventures, and some pro-level flirting, but through all of that there’s one thing that I feel most guilty about not sharing with you.
We need to talk about how amazing these new Tantus Uncuts are. I mean really.
I’ll admit, when Tantus announced new realistics I wasn’t all that excited. Sure new products are always great, and I was thrilled to see a body safe, intact design on the market. Hooray representation! But the shapes of these didn’t seem like anything all that impressive and I expected them be the type of thing that I would have in my collection simply because if how unique they are, not so much for how they feel in my vag.
Sometimes, I am wrong.
Sure the Uncuts are beautiful, highly detailed, realistic, and unique. Sure they’re great items for any collection, but they also feel fucking fantastic.
Both of these toys are made from Tantus’ body safe dual density silicone which I’ve found can sometimes still be surprisingly firm, but in this instance was impressively squishy. It’s still slightly firmer than Vixskin (which y’all know how much I love) but it’s pretty damn good, and the surface is also lightly textured to give it a skin-like feel. On top of all of that Tantus is finally offering a “mocha” option again which is a delightfully realistic darker skin tone, to which again I say: Hooray representation!
Yes they’re gorgeous, highly realistic, and detailed. But like I said, I don’t really care. I’m here for how they feel- which, in short, is amazing.
The smaller of the two (the #2) feels comparable to the Mustang with less squish and more drag. The curved shaft easily finds my g-spot and the head, whose shape is disguised in part by the foreskin covering it, feels surprisingly pronounced. Its great but at only 1.5″ in diameter I quickly start craving something larger.
Enter: Uncut #1
I have not been this enamored with a dildo since the Mustang, and you guys know how much I don’t shut up about that toy. At 1.75″ it’s the perfect stepping stone between my warm-up toys and my larger ones (a size my toybox was sorely lacking) but more than half the time I don’t even turn to something bigger. The Uncut #1 makes me full but not stretched, the curve finds my g-spot effortlessly, and the shape of the head is divine.
Lately, I’ve also favored penetration that is surprisingly deep. Like, cervix bruisingly deep, which is perfect considering the Uncut #1 boasts over 7″ of insertable length- way more than I could typically manage.
I also realize that one day, my cervix is suddenly going to decide it wants none of that, because cervixes are fickle little buggers, and luckily when that day comes the soft head will make any accidental cervical contact pretty tolerable. It will also give me even more length to use as a handle. Hooray!
Some toys are just so good I run out of things to say about them other than “Yes. Go buy it now.” The Uncuts are those toys.
I could go on and on about the astounding detail and realism. I could regale you with tales of the times they made me soak through my throe, or that way the #1 makes my legs shake every single time I use it, or try to describe the whimpery, whiney, inhuman noises it inevitably draws out of me. I could tell you that when these were on display in the Blogger Lounge at Woodhull I still couldn’t keep my hands off of them, even though I knew I already had two at home. I could talk for days about my enthusiasm for Tantus Uncut #1 & #2 and not even touch on how awesome they are so I’ll settle for one simple phrase:
Buy the Tantus Uncuts. Your orifices will thank you.