Traveling With Sex Toys

It’s only a little over a week until Catalyst Con which means sex geeks everywhere will be making their annual pilgrimages to Washington DC, sex toys, lube, and safer sex products in tow. Some people, like myself for example, will making an epic road trip and have the luxury of traveling with a trunk full of dildos, but for everyone else it may not be that easy. Anyone who has traveled by plane in the past ten years knows that it can be difficult to make it to your destination with just your clothes, toiletries, and electronics in tact; if you’re packing sex toys things just got a whole lot more complicated.

What to Bring:

One of the first things to think about is what exactly you plan on bringing with you. I am a chronic over packer, and I pity my partner who has to deal with it on every trip.

Why do we need 4 different books for a three day trip?

Well, I don’t know what I’ll be in the mood to read tomorrow.

And eight shirts?

What if I spill something on one (or three) of them? Just because it’s never happened before…

Okay, but do we really need this bag FULL of dildos?

Yes.

When I’m considering what toys to bring I usually try to hit something in each category. Do I have a good toy for penetration? One for my clit? Well, what if I want something in my butt, am I covered there? Also, if my partner is joining me, do I have a c-ring in case he wants to use one? Oh! Do I have a good G-Spot toy? A paddle?

…and well, you can see how quickly “I’ll just bring a few things” can turn into the bag-o-dildos I usually bring with me.

That said, I’m not usually all that concerned with discretion, if you are you may choose to bring just one small discrete clit vibe or maybe one toy that can work for penetration or clit stimulation depending on your mood. Less realistic toys may also be your friend (says the guy who just packed his Vixskin Maverick in his bag for Catalyst) because they won’t stand out as much during a scan of your bag.

If you’re traveling to an event where you plan on playing with other people, be sure to bring only non-porous toys that are easy to clean/sanitize. Think materials like silicone, stainless steel, wood, and glass. Unfortunately bleach is prohibited on airplanes, either in your carry-on or checked luggage, so you will have to find some when you arrive if you need to sanitize your toys1 during the trip.

It is also important for many people to bring a safer sex kit with them when they travel, but remember, your safer sex kit should include lube, another thing we have to be careful about with TSA guidelines. The TSA has strict regulations about liquids, and lube is considered one of those liquids, so you have to be sort of careful. It’s no worries if you plan on checking your luggage, I’m pretty sure you could check and entire suitcase full of JUST lube and be fine, though it may raise a few eyebrows, but if you want to carry it on then you have to think about it a little bit.

To Check or Not to Check?

You may be thinking, well of course I’ll just check all of it and not have to think about it! Well, while that is a good option for many people, I prefer not to do it. First of all, not all airlines allow free checked luggage, and if you’re only going on a weekend trip it may not be worth it to check your luggage just so you can hide your dildos.

Next up is the bit where I start to sound a little paranoid, but just bear with me. Most often the biggest concern people have about having their toys in their carry-on is that they are afraid the person who searches their bag will find it and pull it out while they are on line. I think people have visions of the TSA waving it around high in the air yelling “Look, it’s a dildo! This person plans on putting this inside them later! They have sex! Let us laugh at them!” Well guess what, the person searching your bag is probably just as embarrassed (if not more so) as you to find it so they’re not going to pull it and wave it around for all the travelers to see.

Alternatively, your checked luggage will go through similar checks (though admittedly, probably not as extensive) to the ones your checked luggage does, but these checks won’t happen in front of you. What does that mean? It means A. You may be spared a bit of embarrassment, but also B. anything can happen.

Look I’ve seen what happens when I leave my partner unattended with my dildos, he stages sword fights with them, that is not what I want happening to my toys with total strangers, especially if I plan on sticking them inside me later. Not only that, but society is accustomed to a certain amount of shame about sex and sex toys. One might assume that if a toy goes missing, someone would be to embarrassed to report it. Am I saying that TSA workers are all 13 year old boys too immature to handle seeing a sex toy? Or thieves waiting to abscond with my beloved silicone dicks? No, of course not. What I’m saying is that I’m paranoid and not willing to risk it. I prefer to keep all of my expensive, fragile, and beloved travel companions (sex toys or otherwise) in my carry-on to protect them from loss or damage.

Inside my carry-on I store my toys in a gallon Ziploc bag within a toy travel bag. This way, if I need to get to something else I can pull the opaque bag out of the way without worrying but if my bag gets searched the TSA representative can pull out whatever toys I have and see them clearly without touching them with those gloves that have handled everyone else’s panties and dirty socks. Also, always be sure to travel lock any vibrators you bring with you (most vibrators have this feature now-a-days) because a vibrating bag is bound to arouse suspicion, trust me.

Like I said earlier, with lube in the carry on things get a bit more complicated. The rule for any liquids in a carry on is 3-1-1; each liquid must be contained in a 3.4 oz (100 ml)  bottle or less, all of those bottles must be contained within 1 quart sized clear plastic zip top bag, and each passenger is only allowed one bag. Unfortunately, most lube bottles are a bit more than 3.4 oz, My favorite lube sells a 4.2 oz bottle as it’s smallest size (so close…). This leaves you with a few options, you could purchase a small empty bottle from the travel section of your favorite retailer and transfer the lube out of its bottle and into the smaller one. Unfortunately, this offers the potential for a slippery-lubey mess. Instead I like to use sample packets of lube, which you can probably find for a dollar or two at your local feminist toy store or at Lucky Bloke. You can get almost any brand in a sample size, one packet is usually plenty for a session, and then you can toss it without having to worry about bringing it home or having it leak in your bag.

As for kink related toys, things may be a little different. Unfortunately the Can I Bring…? tool on the TSA website isn’t very helpful when it comes to floggers, paddles, bondage gear, or electro-stim kits. The only successful answer I got out of it was that “whips and other martial arts gear”2 are allowed but only as checked luggage, handcuffs on the other hand are listed as allowed in a carry on or checked luggage. I spoke to Zoe Hanis and was told that they have never had trouble traveling with kink toys in their luggage, not even when traveling out of the country. In my own experience I was once stopped for having a pair of cheesy handcuffs from Spencer’s Gifts in my carry on bag.3 I was eventually let through after making up some excuse about them being part of a Halloween costume (it was October) but it was still annoying. I’d stick to leaving any BDSM gear in the checked luggage, lest some jerk decide to call your stuff “weapons” and confiscate a $100 flogger.

1. Remember, to sanitize non-porous toys you wipe them down with a solution of 9 parts water to 1 part bleach. [↩]
2. Um, yes. That’s exactly what that is. I am a ninja. [↩]
3. Don’t judge me, I was 16 and I thought they made a cool fashion statement in conjunction will all the other chains I wore. They didn’t. [↩]